Updated: May 31
More than 85% of men experience erectile dysfunction (ED) at some stage during their life time.
Diabetes for example damages veins and can lead to long term damage to veins making erection difficult. Or you may have a high stress job sapping your sexual energy.
Even though you may be going through your own personal crisis; take heart, the problem is more common than you could begin to imagine and there are a number of different options for treating ED.
The first step you have to take is to discover if your ED caused by a specific medical condition or if other factors are the cause.
Medical Conditions That Cause Erectile Dysfunction:
Aside of the neurological, anatomical and hormonal conditions, the usual suspects causing ED are
High Blood Pressure. (Hypertension)
Cardiovascular Disease leading to Atherosclerosis or in layman speak; hardening of the arteries.
High cholesterol levels.
Medical conditions that cause ED are best treated by a Specialist prescribing the appropriate drugs and I urge you not to ignore a “soft situation” but make an appointment with your GP and start solving the problem.
Other Factors That Lead To Erectile Dysfunction:
Are you feeling “let down” by your erection? Maybe you are able to get hard – but not stay hard. Do you wake up with an erection, but when you want to have sex – you simply not hard enough for penetration; this is commonly referred to as a ‘weak erection'.
Perhaps you would like to maintain an erection throughout the foreplay – but you just not ‘staying the course?’
Lifestyle causes of Erectile Dysfunction:
This is a very touchy subject as no man likes to be told his tool box is mess or he is not drilling the right way.
I have seen way too much ed caused by wrong lifestyle choices to just ignore the topic.
Obesity is most likely the most common problem as adipose or fat tissue envelopes the nerves and veins making erection extremely difficult. In most cases obesity is caused by lifestyle like diet and activity or rather lack of activity choices.
Addiction and abuse
Alcohol and drug abuse also influences erection. Substance addiction is habitual behaviour and treating habitual behaviour is best addressed by world wide networks like Alcoholics Anonymous and specialized rehabilitation facilities.
Two Ways To Decide If Your ED is Medical Or Mental.
Do you wake up with an erection?
The best indication of the difference between medical causes and mind games is waking up with an erection.
Do you get erect while you are asleep? Even if you are just vaguely aware that you are getting hard when you are asleep.
These two are signs that you are capable of getting erect and it is most likely your mental state influencing your ability to get erect while you are awake. Please read The post about performance anxiety. Click here.
A Smidgen of Trivia: Good Old Fashioned Stamp Test For Erectile Dysfunction.
Here is the old fashioned, yet, rather simple way of determining if you are getting erect during the night:
Take a few postal stamps, lick them to make them a bit sticky and place – or rather paste them around your penis before you go to sleep. If the perforations are snapped the next morning – then it means you had an erection while you were asleep.
I think it may be just as difficult these days to find carrier pigeons than it would be to find postage stamps.
So the next easiest way would be to monitor if you wake up with an erection or “morning glory” as that will give you an indication that you are capable of erection when you are in an unconscious state of mind. The trick then is - to train your self to be able to get erect when you are conscious.
Five Case Studies
I met a man last year – he had been referred to me as he simply could not get himself hard. He has suffered with diabetes for 27 years.
I used all my skills but there was nothing I could do for him.
This is the sad reality about Diabetes – The veins eventually get completely decimated and it becomes physically impossible for blood to travel into the penis to enable erection. He was rather disappointed and quite frankly so was I – However, a few years ago I worked with a man who had such sever diabetes that he had a small tube poking out of his stomach for applying his insulin and despite that he got an erection.
That clearly shows that each person is different and until I work with a man it is extremely hard - ok, not hard - let me rather say it is extremely difficult to predict what is going on with a man, until I work with him.
Case Three: One Cancer Survivor 22 March 2019
Radical Prostatectomy and ED
74 year old man, in fairly good physical condition, who had a radical Prostatectomy five years ago. He was diagnosed with Prostate Cancer and been given only a few months to live.
Since the complete removal of his prostate he has been unable to get erect, he has however; been able to have orgasms. Once again it is important to know that for certain that Orgasm and Ejaculation are DIFFERENT EVENTS.
The problem with arises when the removal of the prostate is done because of Cancer as Cancer and Testosterone are not compatible.
As men age; testosterone levels go down.
Testosterone is the hormone that facilitates orgasm and as the testosterone level falls - so does the capacity to achieve an orgasm.
Men who have had Cancer are unable to boost their performance by using testosterone replacement drugs.
Some men are able to achieve erection after part, or complete removal of the prostate depending what nerves, blood vessels and muscle damage has been done during the operation. In the case of the man I worked with, he was left completely impotent by the operation and he will never under any circumstances be able to get erect.
The sad part is also that he is unable to use Testosterone replacement drugs and will eventually not even be able to achieve orgasm.
He says he has grown used to the fact his days of any sexual activity are over – but he is happy, content with his lot and very lucky to still be alive.
I decided to share his experience to stress the importance of having you prostate checked regularly.
Of Lifestyles And Mind Games
Case Four: 19 Mar 2019
An obese 49 year old man: He sat down and told me a long story about his troubles; including not having regular sex, hardly ever masturbating, yet he said he was diabetes free and only uses high blood pressure medication.
I asked when last he had an erection and he said he could hardly remember; "maybe... sometime late last year".
Yet from the moment I started working with him I felt my holy grail – LIFE!
There was an immediate reaction, it took maybe 5 minutes and he was rock hard.
I call it the HOLY GRAIL as where there is life there is hope.
When I work with a man with ED it takes me about 5 minutes to be able to tell if there is a possibility of erection or a sign of life as it is the difference between being able to help him with training; or if he needs either medical or medicinal intervention.
In this man's case I suspect it is his mental frame of mind that is making him believe he is incapable of getting erect and as long as he believes that it will be his reality.
Case Five: 23 March 2019
A 67 year old man, perfect fit and physically active- He had earlier in the day done a 10km hike.
He also said he can not get erect and had taken a 20 mg Cialis 4 days ago. He said he only wakes up an erection, but it is gone after his first morning pee and as far as he could tell he did not erect during sleeping - he said he sometimes 'dreams' that he is erect but when he feel his cock it is flaccid. He had no hope of erection. But within in 5 minutes he was hard, however he ejaculated almost immediately and there was very little semen. Once again a man who has convinced himself that he can not get erect when he clearly could.
My own favourite quotation:
“I think I'm Potent! Or I think I am Impotent! - I AM RIGHT!"
Training to be Hard -
is NOT hard.
I firmly believe any person can be better at anything they do by training to be better, that includes sexual performance. No cricket player became the best by thinking about playing cricket or going out once a month to mess around with a bat. The exact same principal applies to sexual performance. If you want to be better at sex then you have to train yourself to be better. It really is as simple as that. If you would like an assessment you may submit a
© Masseuse Ariana 2015
This post was first published in 2015. Case studies added and updated 15 September 2020